May 08, 2015

EoT: Conspiracy Theories and Cocaine Crunch

Eyes on Texas, a roundup of news, columns and features about the state, from media around the world.

A planned three-month military training exercise in Texas called Jade Helm has stirred up all sorts of conspiracy theories. Now actor Chuck Norris has joined the crowd of those convinced it’s a government plot to impose martial law on the state.

“The U.S. government says, ‘It’s just a training exercise,’ ” Norris said in his column for WorldNet Daily. “But I’m not sure the term ‘just’ has any reference to reality when the government uses it.”

He called on citizens to fight with their “dying breaths for liberty, especially when it appears those in power are trying to knock down Old Glory,” according to The Daily Mail.

Norris, former star of the “Walker, Texas Ranger,” television show, said he was especially worried because the exercises will come close to his ranch in Navasota, southeast of College Station.

Pentagon officials say the seven-state exercise that starts in July is to train troops to operate in various difficult environments.

The reaction to Jade Helm has spurred plenty of satirical responses, but bigamericannews.com takes the cake, reporting that the exercise is part of President Obama’s master plan to invade “Western America” and make it “the Kingdom of Liberal Darkness.”

But wait, there’s more, the satirical site said. The president is causing racial unrest in America to distract everyone from his evil plan. He also plans to kidnap former President George W. Bush.

Got that?

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Holy Cracker Jack!

If the greatest secrets are hidden in the most unlikely of places, then a San Antonio grandmother found it in a Nature Valley granola bar.

Cynthia Rodriguez opened the crunchy snack and discovered a packet filled with white powder. Assuming that it was part of a promotional giveaway, she called General Mills, thinking that she had won a prize. Instead, she was told to contact the police.

Investigators determined that the bag was filled with cocaine, according to The Guardian. But there’s no explanation yet on why or how the cocaine ended up in the granola bar.

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Ron Paul, the former Republican congressman from Texas, is a doctor, not an investment expert. But he says Americans should prepare themselves for a looming economic catastrophe, according to Buzzfeed.

“I fear there will be civil unrest, a drop in stock prices, pension fund collapses, big changes to Social Security and Medicare, the erosion of personal liberties, bank and brokerage closings, and ultimately a major crisis, as the U.S. dollar is rejected for almost any non-paper alternative,” Paul says in a radio ad and YouTube video.

The ad directs listeners to ronpaulwarnings6.com. for videos on how to protect themselves.

The video advertises a “2020 Survival Kit” for $49.50, marketed by

Stansberry & Associates Investment Research. It includes gems like “the secret paper currency that the wealthiest people in the world use” and tips on opening a foreign bank account online, “no visit required.”

By Gloria Fan